EP36: It’s gonna be what it’s supposed to be

Our guest this week is the man who had the balls to make Zaeli a wife! Listen as Chris asks Joe all the questions Megyn Kelly was too Megyn Kelly to pose during their appearance on her hour of The Today Show. Marvel as the famously dashing Joe pulls back the curtain on his own…

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EP35: That’s what got me into nursing

Alpha Female Marta was more than excited to sit down and share her sex life on her son’s podcast. That’s right, Chris’s Mother wowed our hosts with stories of human trafficking, FBI agents and their micro-gadgets, older men exploiting her in a good way, and how the staff at hospitals play doctor to kill the time.

EP33: The quiet ones are the freaky ones

If all of our internet connections were as slow as they used to be, perhaps we would be forced to utilize our imaginations… would that be so bad? Our guest doesn’t think so. Once a young giant, G-Su explains why growing up in Brownsville, TX. led to a role as a Nazi, the reason he is known to some as “Juice”, and why he lived a year of his life as a “yes man”.

EP32: The logical and handsome ones

With a comb pulled through his coal black hair, and suited up from head to toe, our guest takes his cues from classic gents like Carey Grant and James Bond. The suspiciously Vulcan like comedian explains why he has abstained from sex for 33 years, how he is no cafeteria Catholic, and that aside from his forearms, he has nothing to hide…

EP28: Not even counting the little things

Do you remember your life before 7th grade? For a long time our guest couldn’t recall much of her youth. She does remember feeling love in extremes, taking a shot at being a man, getting carded under awkward circumstances, standing up against a terrible improviser, and throwing her own birthday parties. This is a surprisingly light episode considering the heavy subject matter, you have been warned!

EP24: Cock Tale Party #2

Gather round the campfire everybody, Chris is dead sober and burning some old furniture, taking turns with the main brain Zaeli on the mic getting ALL the dirty deets on botched threesomes, little dicks, curious butts, gonorrhea, and all other kinds of nongonococcal.

EP18: Is this some action movie?

Cruising and dogging along comes our guest David, a producer/filmmaker, talking about what it’s like to be both homosexual and heterosexual, how we might all be programmed, and the reason that the day he lost his virginity is one he can never forget.

EP17: My Mom was born in a toilet

Straight out of the butt hole of Texas, Nana dances her way into the hearts of our hosts with stories of love-able evil Aunts, taking shots of tequila with her alleged Father, and building loving relationships with fit guys even if their dick game is trash.

EP16: Foibles and Peccadilloes

A gay man comfortable in a woman’s body, Kim Bob Benny talks about strapping young boys in huarache sandals, wanting to start a giant reservation for women so they can screen for asshole men, and gives a spicy new meaning to desk jobs.

EP14: The Princess Spanky Pants Fan Club

Comedian Emma Arnold talks to Zaeli and Chris about being a Mother of six, moonlighting as a Mormon, and her journey to realizing she’s more than just one of the guys.

EP13: I slayed the Dragon

A long time friend of Chris’ came to visit Austin and decided to take a seat in the cock-pit to share stories of meeting his girlfriend in a fantasy land, dicks getting bent out of shape, and just how intimately he and Chris know one another.

EP12: From asexual to a sexual deviant

Health coach, Japanese enthusiast, and champion of misfits, Emile walks us through her journey out of self harm into a more nutritious life, falling in love with an entire city, and the power of seeing those whom feel invisible.

EP11: Got the talk from talk radio

This week we explore the mind of a man who grew up with pigs, fled the Midwest for greener pastures, and despite his comfort sporting a “man-kini” always wondered if by not being attracted to men, he was missing out on something.

EP10: M.C. Pussy Christmas

Director and world class comedian Paul Provenza joins Zaeli and Chris in the cock-pit to discuss growing up surrounded by strong women, being stuck in the first girl he ever slept with, and how is becoming more and more like a chimp everyday.

EP9: Hand gestures make more sense

With a shaved head like Eleven of Stranger Things, the wild child Claire tells tales of running away from home, getting her creepy P.E. teacher fired, and how birth control gets under her skin.

EP8: Mouths just taste like that

This week comedian Lindsey Easterwood cuts to the chase as she always does, to tell us what it’s like to be twenty as fuck and livin’ off cake here in the Lone Star State capital. Spoiler: it’s a most hilarious mix of casual and wild.

EP7: The egg had a veil

What’s the difference between having style and seeking attention? How should a man flirt with your womb? Our guest Alyssa shares about growing up a smart-ass and getting southern manners spanked right into her.

EP6: The package came with the package

Comedian, veteran, and tall righteous lady Jami Schoffner fills us in on her past stealing cars, driving submarines, and dealing with the dick she never asked for.

EP5: The tits in my family

On brand as a way of life, Cassidy shares her thoughts on Jesus as a lover, co-creating a phallus with a friend, and the importance of being nice.

EP4: What are straight people?

A master of modern ballet and self-given tats, Alex tells us what makes a blowjob good, who’s into diaper play, how everyone wins when you don’t compete, and why a podcast is all about the outfit.

EP2: One half of a power couple

Hitch up your fanciest basketball shorts because today we’re talking with up and coming comedian Danny Palumbo about ambitious women, the pressure to be promiscuous, and that time sex landed him in the ER.

EP1.2: Pretty Woman-y

Finish the juiciness you started; hear the rest of our interview with Ixi here! It’s got broken engagements, non-monogamy, and the alleged selfishness of female self-esteem.

EP1: Pretty Woman-y

For our very first episode, Chris and Zaeli put a truly special lady on the spot: traveling wedding photographer, longtime Austinite, and recent New York Times Magazine cover girl, Ixi Kirkilis! Here in Part One, we talk growing up as an only child, having sex in your parents’ house, and repressed adolescent gender dysphoria!

EP34: The Manxperiment

Blake and Zaeli sit down with Chris to get the jitters out before their national television debut on NBC’s Megyn Kelly Today. They discuss the powerful bond forged through a painful but needed “wake up”, how sobriety led to taking control back from Blake’s dick, why they dislike the brand of “polyamory”, and the fateful night at the Love Goat open mic that transformed Nosferatu into a man. 

EP32.2: The logical and handsome ones

In the second half of this conversation we discover more about our mysterious suitor, his faith and devotion to Catholicism, managing expectations, melting cupcakes, and how Rocky and 007 shaped his ideal proposal to the woman of his dreams.

EP31: If you build it.. I will come..

Our guest learned about sex from the Sims, spent time cruising Fetlife, and was almost named Bailey… whew! That was a close one. She also recounts times she had sex like a ninja, how condoms are as foreign to her as VHS, her Father’s advice to “keep the plan and dump the man”, and other…

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EP30: The Summer of Spank

%100 man, born in Texas, raised in Arkansas, and named after the great city that we all hail from, Austin has always been a Milf-man. His years spent in the bible belt filled him with stories of encountering cougars, sinning before his grandmothers baffled eyes, and being one of the special people his Daddy feels comfortable exposing his nudist side to. 

EP29: Get in line! Challenge accepted..

Claire and I invited our friend Emily over to share stories with us about  going to a progressive elementary school, checking out guys of all types and sizes, consolatory solo cups of warm tap water, and knocking boots in a boot.  

EP27: If it smells like water, go swimming

When my fellow comic Leah asked if she could stop by with her friend Jenee and a bottle of wine, none of us had any idea that we would end up sharing cocktales as well. Be glad we did though, because we got into the fine art of eating booty, what makes size matter, discovering…

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EP26: God knows I masturbated on someone’s arm

More curious than Curious George himself, our very sensitive guest, co-host of Gender Fluids (a podcast about sex, sexuality, and gender) discusses struggling with same sex attraction, overcoming her fear of hugs, and the power of repent. Also, Zaeli shares her version of the French Press.